Winner Spotlight 1.3: Control the Pace

Congratulations to our Judges’ Choice for Challenge 3: Allison Rott!

About Allison:

Allison Rott, (pronounced 'wrote') lives in Illinois. A voracious reader from her own childhood she hasn’t lost her love of stories or the many ways of telling them. allisonwrote.com is the place to find her blog and the information on the seven short stories already published.

Her entry “Bernie’s Video” explores the consequences when thrill-seeker Bernie is a different kind of brave but just a little too late. Her use of pacing helped to create a poignant contrast between the high energy of Bernie creating the video and the subsequent reaction of Louie who watches it later.

One of our favourite snippets from her entry was:

“Finally!” The group burst into laughter again. 

An abrupt cut ended the video. 

Almost all eyes turned to where Louie had once been sitting in the front pew.

Only Charles, Louie’s father, knew the moment his son’s whole body shuddered, his skin had taken on an ashy pallor and his breath hitched before he ran out of the room. Everything happened in the few seconds the funeral director mentioned they had a video from the deceased and the moment before the tech popped to life.

The fast pace of the previous scene is abruptly ended and the narrative switches to a deliberate slow-pace so the reader can focus entirely on the visceral reaction Louie has to the video. We thought this was a really effective way to utilise pacing in a way that serves the overall plot. A heart-breaking story which was nevertheless a pleasure to read!

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Write Track winner spotlights are selected by judges' consensus.